I have felt myself being coaxed into my shy little world again. I am drawing quiet.
My head is reeling with thoughts, plans, ideas and predictions. I wonder if I was too bold, too unorthodox. It is troubling and fills me with much anxiety.
The anxiety stems from within. I am filled with fear and excitement, disappointment and emotionalism. I cannot read people as well as I'd like. Maybe I made a move too quick?
Either way, there is yet another 36 hours of potential torment. I'd like to think he is considering my offer to go out and have a fun yet civilized time. Little speaking and all. Sounds perfect. However, I am far from naive enough to believe he is simply delaying due to deep consideration. It really isn't that complicated. Simply put, he could be searching for a way to weasel his way out of it with grace.
Tricky this one is.
He cannot avoid me indefinitely. Then again he can ignore me for that time frame. I shouldn't stress like this.
All this aside it is easy to stress out about this one single element in my life. He is a treasure to me, and heaven forbid he has the demeanor of a rabbit-- full of skiddishness.
What I do know is that I, yes me, would greatly enjoy his untypical company. I simply desire his uninterrupted presence. There is such peace in his one on one company. I greatly enjoy any little minute I am blessed to get. Crazy I say. Crazy.
I should stop before I break out in poetry.
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